Taking out the trash
I have a question for all the married people. When I'm home with Ellie during the day I try to clean things up around the house as much as possible, but as many might know, it's really hard to get anything done when Ellie is awake (no offense Ellie). Then when she does go down for her nap I like to get homework done so I don't have to do it at night when Marce is home. So, sometimes the house is a disaster when Marci gets home. But a lot of times I am at least able to do the dishes and clean up the front room.
Well, lately Marci's been wondering why I don't usually do certain things without being asked. Specifically, taking out the trash. Marci thinks that I should do it without being asked every time, and I'm like "dude, I don't even think about it." If she had seen my apartment before we got married she would understand that cleaning is not the number one priority on my list although I've gotten much better. Anyways, even if I did think about it it's like 10 degrees outside and snowing and I only have 1 hour of time when Ellie is asleep and I could even take out the trash and that's not what I want to do with that hour.
So my question to you is:
Am I a bad husband because I have to be asked to take out the trash? (She doesn't think I'm a bad husband, and has never said that)
As you ponder this question, keep in mind that I do the dishes almost every night (I'm just trying to influence your answers to be more favorable towards me :) )
*side note: The worst part about taking out the trash is having to put the new bag in afterwards. Don't you hate that?
Labels: Husband/Dad Duties, Trash
This entry was posted
on Tuesday, February 10, 2009 at 9:57 PM.
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Oh Mike... I love this post for so many reasons.
I had to think about how to answer your question for quite some time though. To be honest, my first response was, yes... you are absolutely horrible for not seeing something that needs to be done and doing it the minute that Ellie falls asleep...
but then I caught myself and cringed. I looked at all the unfolded laundry and the stack of dirty dishes, the clutter of whatever on my table and laughed.
If Greg got home from meeting with clients and nagged on me for all of the undone things around our house I think I would pop him a good one.
Your first paragraph describes most stay-at-home mom's frustrations. We take care of our kid's needs first and formost, we try to get all the other demanding things done (i.e. laundry, dishes, etc.) but we are just one person and sometimes its just not the priority.
So I am staying on nuetral ground. I'm not going to call you a horrible husband... because i think you get bonus points for wanting to have your homework done so you can spend your evenings with Marci. :)
BUT... its probably a good idea to talk to Marce about priorities and expectations on housework since you guys have crazy schedules with you finishing up school and her working and both of you guys taking such good care of that adorable daughter. It's so much better to be on the same page.
Thanks for your viewpoint. I sometimes have such a hard time seeing life from a my husband's perspective.
p.s. I totally agree about your side note though, putting the new bag in the garbage can afterwards is the pits.
sorry, i think my comment was longer than your post ;)
I'm a friend of Marci's from high school and just saw your blog on Marci's. Brandon doesn't take out the trash either. I don't get it. I see it, it's right there, he MUST see it, but just doesn't register. I think it's just that guys and girls are made different. To guys, well my hubby, he doesn't think that washing the pans and wiping of the table are part of doing the dishes. And cleaning up means more of straightening up a little bit. It's nice to know it's not just us. :)
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